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Are You Ready For Honeymoon Sex


Did you know that many couples admit they don’t sex on their wedding night? All the emotions, expectations and preparation for the wedding day have somewhat left them tired, cranky, and perhaps even nervous. After all, why go through the motions of lovemaking half-heartedly when you factor in the context of the rest of your lives? This brings us to our topic: Honeymoon sex.

Playing coy. Photo by d’ZIGN for you. Pre-wedding of Jocelyn and Johnny.

When planning your dream honeymoon, it is perfectly fine to want to spend part of your time enjoying the local sights and attractions rather than being holed up in your hotel room pleasuring and titillating each other. Yet it is undeniable that sex during your honeymoon can be loaded with expectations.

You are at the prime of your life and sex – great sex - is on the cards. Will we have enough sex? Will honeymoon sex be amazing and memorable? More importantly, will I meet the expectations of my spouse? What do I need to do?

It is natural to have questions, even experience anxiety about honeymoon sex. For starters, this is a chance to share some of your sexual thoughts, feelings and desires for the honeymoon, or for that matter, sex in the marriage.

You may have had sex before but for most couples, the opportunity to have some fun in the bedroom in a hotel or resort room doesn’t come around very often – and now you have the entire honeymoon to enjoy each other and the time you spend together.

Here are five sentences you can use as an exercise to initiate a discussion with your partner:

  • Three things I heard from others about honeymoon sex are...
  • I am feeling ________ about honeymoon sex because....
  • Three things I would like to experience on our honeymoon are...
  • Three things I would like for you to do for me on our honeymoon are...
  • (Add one other sentence of your own)

If you are making love for the first time on your honeymoon, it is important to realise that, unlike in the movies, this is a physical act which does not come naturally for most people. You could consider meeting with a clinical sexologist to prepare yourself mentally and physically for what to expect during sex.

During lovemaking, the penis is inserted into the vagina. One partner will usually use a hand to slide the inner labia apart and guide the head of the penis into the vaginal opening. It is normal for it to feel awkward and uncomfortable, rather than mind blowing and awesome.

Go slow, be gentle with each other and focus on the physical pleasures of touch and intimacy possible. Talk to each other: ask what's working and what isn't, don’t assume that what feels good for you feels good for him or her. If there is excessive pain, stop and consult with a doctor after your honeymoon.

Take some time to put together a honeymoon sex kit as the additional touches that make a world of difference. Some things you may like to include are:

Contraception - Unless you are already on the Pill (for the bride), have your partner put on a condom, or, if you're the male partner, please use the condom on if you are not planning for a baby.

Touches of Romance - Flowers, perfume and candles are some of the basic ingredients to fire up your intimate honeymoon experience.

Music - Take along your favourite romantic music to help set the scene.

Lingerie - Indulge yourself with some pretty lingerie to really get your husband’s engine purring.

Erotica - Reading sex stories to each other can turn the room temperature up a few notches. There are books, board games, and lots and lots of card games that will help you spice things up.

Your honeymoon symbolises the beginning of a new life. Let it begin with love and laughter--whether you are exploring the streets of a busy city, skiing on a mountain, or backpacking in the countryside. Remember to incorporate some degree of fun and enjoying each other mentally and physically during your honeymoon – sexually and non-sexually.

In the years ahead, there will be more to learn about each other, but the happy memories of your wedding and honeymoon will keep your hearts strong and bright through the good and bad times.

Article contributed by Dr. Martha Lee.
Dr. Martha Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching in Singapore. She holds a Doctorate in Human Sexuality and Certificates in Sex Therapy, Counselling and Coaching. She provides sex and life coaching, runs sex educational workshops and gives public talks.

Related Images
Theme: Destination
Keywords: Bride and Groom, Getting Ready, Kiss, Wedding Planning

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